slickaway's thoughts on the matter

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Slowly but surely, things are coming together

So I'm better.

I don't hurt when I think about him.
I only ache a little instead.

And being at the cottage did help a lot. Even though we had internet and a laptop available, I exercised control. I didn't let myself log in or wonder what was going on online. And I didn't mope around. It was actually the best Maple Brae I've ever had.

And I didn't let myself count down the days until he left. Maybe the day of I was not the happiest camper, but I had cousins to take care of, and I tried not think about it. And after trying not to think about it, you just don't think about it. Naturally, and without effort. And then you realize that you haven't been thinking about it and you'll feel an ache. But when you have pushed that aside, you're okay again.

And I have my own adventure coming up. I'm going away to Europe for a month. Again, nothing to remind me of him. And maybe I'll kiss a French man, or smooch on the beach with an Italian man. Maybe I won't think about Conor and how much I miss him. Or maybe I'll stop missing him altogether. Either possibility would be a wonderful improvement.

3:52 p.m. - 2009-09-02

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